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NO ONE deserves to be abused, and the only person responsible for the abuse is the ABUSER!
It is not the victims’ actions or behaviors that trigger the abuse! Therefore, the victims’ changes in actions and behaviors cannot and will not stop future abuse!
To the right are links to several pages explaining what abuse is and how you or a loved one can get out of an abusive relationship. You will also find a link for a short quiz to help you or a loved one determine if a relationship is abusive. Also, there are links to help you or a loved one create a plan to escape the abusive relationship. Remember, THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR ABUSE!
WHAT IS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?
Domestic violence is the willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior as part of a systematic pattern of power and control perpetrated by one intimate partner against another. It includes physical violence, sexual violence, threats, and emotional abuse. The frequency and severity of domestic violence can vary dramatically.
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IN INDIANA
• In a single day in 2014, Indiana domestic violence programs served 1,807 victims/survivors.i
• On that same day, there were 182 requests for services that went unmet due to a lack of resources.ii
• Between July 1, 2013 and June 30, 2014, 67 Indians died in domestic violence homicides.iii
• Over half of domestic violence homicides in Indiana are committed with a gun.iv
DID YOU KNOW?
• 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men in the United States have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner.v
• On a typical day, domestic violence hotlines receive approximately 21,000 calls, an average of close to 15 calls every minute.vi
• Intimate partner violence accounts for 15% of all violent crime.vii
• The presence of a gun in the home during a domestic violence incident increases the risk of homicide by at least 500%.viii
• 72% of all murder-suicides involved an intimate partner; 94% of the victims of these crimes are female.ix
How Can I Get Out of an Abusive Relationship?
Here are some helpful suggestions:
- * Establish and hide a second set of car keys, house keys, or other important keys.
- * Create a hidden “emergency” fund; save even a dollar or two per week if possible.
- * Fill and hide a suitcase, if possible, with a couple of changes of clothes for you and your children.
* Keep the suitcase in its normal storage area in your home or give it to a trusted friend or relative. Also include a list of important phone numbers and important legal papers in the suitcase such as birth certificates, social security cards, custody papers, protective orders, medical information, marriage license, bank account information, etc. Make copies and leave originals in normal files if possible.
- * If you cannot pack a suitcase, fill a specific dresser drawer or box with the items listed above and conceal safely. DO NOT OVERPACK! Your partner is much more likely to notice if several items are not in their usual places.
- * Develop a phone back-up plan. Sometimes an angry batterer will throw or confiscate your cell phone leaving you without a way a calling for help. To protect yourself in case this happens, purchase an inexpensive “pay as you go” cell phone or save several quarters (for use in pay phones) and hide with the phone or quarters with your suitcase items.
- * If you or your children take medicine regularly, include a few pills and try to save an old prescription bottle if possible to pack in your suitcase.
- * Develop a plan for calling for help. If you have children, teach them to dial 911 in an emergency, and tell them they can run to a neighbor’s house if they can’t get to a phone or are fearful for their safety. If you trust one of your neighbors, try to develop a signal system so that they may know if you need help.
Call for help if you need it! You may be able to confide in a friend or relative who can help you with the logistics of getting you and your children out safely, or you can call 911 or a domestic violence shelter advocate.
New Directions is here to help you! Call our 24-hour crisis line any time of the night or day at (812) 662-8822 or call 911 if you are in current danger.